1. Buy everything. This recession is bound to end soon right? My in depth analysis of the situation leads me to believe that it will last another 37 minutes so don't waste your time. While people are losing their houses you can be putting yourself into a massive pile of debt buying them. Then in 37 minutes you can sell them for MASSIVE PROFITS!
*Bonus tip, save money buying houses the pervious owners shot themselves in.2. Just the necessities. Don't waste your money buying things you don't need. You are already in dept from all the houses you just bought so now is the time to act. Do you really need that shower every day? Your wasting precious water and increasing your hydro bill. Have children? Get rid of them. They cost you money and time you could spend whoring yourself out for $50 a pop.
3. Are you married to someone who makes more money than you? Divorce them and move into one of the several houses you've purchased.
4. Repeat. Find someone who is rich, divorce them and take their money. This is particularly easy if you happen to be an attractive young woman.
Something like this
5. Steal someones identity. Why should you have to deal with the repo men taking away your stuff when you can have them do it to a completely innocent stranger? Just steal someones identity and have them deal with all the problems that you cause.
6. Deal drugs. Its tax free income and according to my research if you get arrested they put you in a place called the "big house" with other people FOR FREE! Sounds like a great way to save money and make new friends while only having to give up your freedom for a predetermined period decided by the judge.
Don't you want to make more people this happy?
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